Homegrown

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“Reality is a network of granular events; the dynamic that connects them is probabilistic; between one event and another, space, time, matter, and energy melt into a cloud of probability.”  –  Carlo Rovelli

“Come out of the movie of past and future, time and space, and turn to meet a sacred moment, this moment, the only moment there is . . . Feel the pressure in your head, the fluttery sensations in your belly.  Feel your feet on the ground, the way the air moves across your nostrils . . . Your heart may be broken, friend, your old dreams may have crumbled to dust, but you’re always in the right place for life.”  – Jeff Foster

Hey old friend, what have you been up to, where have you been, what brings you back now?  What connects us?  It is no longer photography, is it?  Or was it ever that?

At first it seemed like it was the film school orientation and beach shoot. Then now underwater photography and your “depstressed” state – – depressed and stressed.

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What is the likelihood of those arising closely together?

Friend, I have told you in jest and also in all seriousness that I am not your teacher.  And that you have never appointed me to be one, so I am just sharing in a manner that you can easily tune out of, or even not be aware of, like a blog post link you never open. Or the conversation that did not seem to happen.

I have seen you make up a plan, build up your resolve, hesitate and then give up.  Where did you draw you energy from when you outlined your 6.6 – point plan, where did you get your resolve to come here, to walk to the edge?  Where did you get your energy to hesitate, your energy to stop, your energy to let your homegrown fear take over?

Okay given that things did not turn out as you hoped it would be; given how invested you were (are?) in that seemingly one-sided relationship; given that you do not know what the next steps are, what the next step is . . . you are still, my dear friend, in the right place for life.

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